Whether you’re in the perimenopause stage or have just entered menopause, you probably have a lot of questions. This era of your life can be quite confusing, as your symptoms may vary day-by-day and you’re experiencing a lot of changes, mentally and physically.

There is no one-size-fits-all answer when it comes to menopause, as everyone’s body is different, but there are plenty of myths and conflicting advice out there. That’s why we asked experts to separate fact from fiction and answer some of the biggest questions about what really happens during menopause, and what you can do to feel informed and supported.

Myth: Weight gain is inevitable

If you’ve noticed that you’re gaining weight or having trouble losing stubborn pounds, you’re not alone. Heather Ritter, RDN, LDN, exclusively told Parenthood Together, “Metabolic and body composition changes during menopause are real and hormonally driven, and the standard calorie-math advice frequently fails women in this life stage, which is discouraging for people already doing everything ‘right.’

Registered dietitian Morgan Beemiller, RDN, LDN, shared, “Hormonal changes can make it easier to gain abdominal fat and more difficult to maintain muscle.” However, don’t despair. She added, “Weight gain isn’t necessarily unavoidable. Strength training, regular physical activity, adequate protein intake, and overall healthy eating habits can help maintain body composition.”

Another myth is that menopause destroys your metabolism. While it does slow down, Beemiller told us, “The decrease in calorie needs comes from aging and gradual loss of muscle mass. Strength training, eating enough protein, and staying physically active can be more effective than trying to boost metabolism with special foods and/or supplements.”

Myth: A menopause diet fixes everything

Many women going through menopause try to eat less or cut out food they think will make them gain weight, but Morgan Beemiller told us, “There is no single ‘menopause diet.’  The strongest evidence for long-term health is generally the same ones that are recommended for everyone: whole grains, lean proteins, healthy fats, adequate calcium and vitamin D, and plenty of fruits and vegetables.”

Instead of going on a “diet,” focus on getting in more protein. Mayo Clinic suggests that anywhere between 1.2 and 2 grams of protein per kilo of your body weight per day is good for menopausal women. To figure that out, divide your weight by 2.2, and if you’re trying to lose weight, multiply the amount by 1.2.

Myth: Menopause happens suddenly

If you feel like those hot flashes or mood swings just came out of nowhere, know that it’s been an ongoing process. “The biggest myth is that menopause is a single, sudden event. It’s not. It’s a transition that can unfold over 7 to 10 years, starting with perimenopause,” expert Heather Ritter exclusively shared with Parenthood Together.

The registered dietitian added, “Menopause itself is defined retrospectively as the point 12 months after your last period. A lot of women think they’re ‘too young’ to be having symptoms because they’re still getting periods, when irregular cycles are often the first sign perimenopause has already started.”

Ritter also pointed out that menopause is not just a reproductive event. “Estrogen receptors exist throughout the body (brain, bone, heart, gut, skin), so the symptoms that show up, such as brain fog, joint aches, anxiety, changes in digestion, are often dismissed as ‘just stress’ or aging, when they’re physiologically connected to hormonal shifts.”

Myth: Calcium is the only way to preserve bone health

You’ve probably heard that women lose bone density as they age, and it’s because of a drop in estrogen levels, per the Endocrine Society. You can lose up to 20% of bone loss during menopause, which can lead to osteoporosis and fractures.

Don’t just rely on taking more vitamins, although the right ones are important. Registered dietitian Morgan Beemiller advised, “Calcium is important, but it is only one piece to the puzzle. Bone health also depends on vitamin D, weight-bearing and resistance exercises, adequate protein intake, limiting excessive alcohol, and avoiding smoking.” 

Milk and other dairy products aren’t the only way to up your calcium intake. Almonds, leafy greens, fish, and tofu provide enrichment, per Healthline. And for vitamin D, turn to fatty fish like mackerel, salmon, and tuna. Eggs and orange juice are also great sources of vitamin D. 

Menopause affects everyone differently, but you don’t have to go through it alone. If you’re not already a part of our Parenthood Together community, join our private Facebook Group and share your thoughts, read members’ insights, or simply take solace in having a supportive space to connect with others who understand.